Friday, November 08, 2002

Some Other Plans That Won't Work

I did have a quite brilliant in its impossibility political strategy dream last night. I dreamed that there could be two solutions to the terrifying situation we-have-been-in-for-a-while-that-just-got-a-lot-worse (I should have been German).

I was talking to Kristin...wait! I think I posted this dream already. She had bought a lot of toilet paper? Oh, who cares no one reads this blog anyway...Ah, that makes me strangely happy. So I can just repeat myself repeat myself repeat myself.

I do consider my future self to be a different person in certain respects though. I post for her...I post for you

Future Miel

Anyway...the political dream...Kristin had bought a lot of consumer products in bulk. So very unlike her. In any case I told her my plan...(1) HAVE RADICALS SECRETLY TAKE OVER THE REPUBLICAN PARTY...Yes, we'd have to recruit them young. They'd have to be blonde with big smiles...they'd have to be white and very, very middle class...And willing to marry women who will bear young uncomplainingly and look ultra-feminine...Etc. But if we got them to be leftists young enough, etc., etc. We'll teach them both Marx and to enjoy football and get MBA's (or whatever makes it possible for you to get into a fraternity). Then....slowly but surely...they begin to run for office! They take over. They are in office--radical lefties on the inside, George Pataki clones on the outside.

Could we breed them? That would probably work better as a way to get them to do our bidding...(Hmmmm. Maybe that is where they come from though? Is there a farm?)

And then! Well...Uh...I'll figure that part out later.

This obviously takes a lot of money.

Plan (2) requires much less money. In plan (2) we just convince EACH AND EVERY SINGLE PERSON NOT TO VOTE!! NO ONE VOTES...ABSOLUTELY NO ONE. And then...No one can win. There will be NO elected officials.

Plan (2) is not terribly easy to execute however (I assume each candidate will vote for him/herself but then the vote really comes down to which candidate has the most family members--how do we stop the wives and children from voting?). Still, it's worth a shot.

The alternative plan is (I am executing this one daily):

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